Scooterotica

The lambretta sx185 is a mythical beast found only in the western reaches of the area formerly known as the gateshead metropolitan borough council.

Key features :

-Slower than anything else you've ridden recently
-Starts first kick
-makes girls say "eeeee that's lush", but they won't sleep with you

Other sx185s can be brought into existence but only by changing something else into one by using a form of alchemy also known as 'raping your savings'

The sx185 is capable of self dismantlisation over just a few miles. It is recommended that the vehicle is followed by a small van e.g. Viva, to collect the parts during this process.

Whilst known for its sturdiness among ignoramae they cognoscenti know otherwise.

The sx185 and all its derivatives (gp200, tv175, sx200, yzf750, gsxr1300 etc) are capable of speeds in excess of 22m/s.

While weighing in at only 100kg the sx185 needs to have its paltry excuse for a fuel tank topped up every time it's dragged out of its natural habitat; the workshop.

Is the Viva a Vauxhall or a typo? Think you'd struggle to get one in the back of a HA/B/C but not seen the "new" version but it looks small.

Merc Vivo I could see, terrible over-priced shite though.

SunnieBell wrote:....... one should bear in mind that the seat is non-rotating and not as comfortably padded as that found on some bigger mobility scooters.

'kin blew it right at the death, I was sold until then.

Anyone got a cheap Viva van for sale?

The sad thing Martin is that you actually read it.... .....

Are Casa going to be making spares for them, or will it be cheap far eastern tat again. There inna owt worse than being stuck in Aldi or Lidl with my classy friends , broken down awaiting recovery due to poor parts quality.cheers,Speedy.

As long as I can fit lights and mirrors to it.....

I think mobility scooters look hot with apehangers teamed with a stained muscle vest and carefully cultivated BO. Far eastern copy sidewinder seats are also urine proof and can be slumped in outside the news agents while cadging money for sherry.perfect for giving 15 year old girls a ride around the park without them easily being able to get off again.HOWEVER...not really portable though ,as if youre a spacker in the first place, lugging it up the stairs to youre sheltered housing flat every night after a session in gateshead town centre on special brew isnt really feasible.

Don't jest - I was stuck behind an artic stuck behind a mobility scooter on the A30 out of Truro once, for about 5miles. The queue was huge. When I finally got to overtake it, I was impressed to see how much it resembled a toilet tent with it's waterproof outfit on. The A30 though, I couldn't believe it.